Now ain't that a bitch!

For some reason, my body and I have not been friends this year! Between that stupid virus, the cavity I need to go have filled, a weird lump in my knee and lately my stinkin' big toe, I have been a medical mess. The damn toe started a couple of months ago when I took off my nail polish and noticed a white spot in the middle. I immediately panicked thinking it was a fungal infection and raced to the doctor. She said she thought it was an injury and to leave it be until we get back from Mexico. She said if it still looked bad or worse, I should go to the podiatrist once I was back. Well, the toe was getting progressively worse and over the weekend I started to get unnerved when I could literally see space between my nail bed and the nail! And it was hurting! I bucked it up and made a podiatrist's appointment today. Figured I should get to the bottom of this crap BEFORE heading out of the country. To my great relief, this was NOT a fungal infection (hooray, no Lamisil for me!) but was an injury. An injury that had cracked the nail way back down beneath the cuticle. Anyway, I had two choices, I could wait around for Mother Nature to do it's job and basically have the nail fall off or get knocked off somewhere in Mexico (she assumed it would happen in a week to 10 days) or she could remove it. Since I didn't want to be pussy-footing around and worrying over a stupid toenail in Mexico, I told her to just yank the damn thing! Now I have a disgusting little nail-less nub! Here I go out and get my hair cut and colored, my eyebrows waxed, I've got cute clothes for Mexico and a beautiful dress for the wedding but none of that matters because I'll have this nasty, freakish toe with NO NAIL!!! I am so grossed out at the moment I can hardly stand it! And I know, vanity at it's worst, but seriously... the timing of this could NOT have been worse! Nothing makes a girl feel more sexy and alluring than a troll toe! So I get to spend the entire summer, when I'm normally parading around in flip flops or sandals with beautifully painted toenails, wearing closed toed shoes hiding my freakish deformation! Nice.