The Saturday of Sloth

And no, I'm not talking about the 3-toed variety that hangs in trees in South America. I'm talking laziness, idleness, apathy... one of the seven deadly sins. It's funny, I was speaking of this very subject not more than a few days ago with one of my wise and witty friends. Why is it, that we moms have such a hard time letting go? As much as I try to sit on my ass on a Saturday afternoon, I just can't! It drives me CRAZY! I'll sit for a few minutes, browsing or Facebooking, but then I have to get up and do the dishes. I can sit on the couch for a few minutes watching HGTV with Big Daddy, but then I become overwhelmed and I have to get up to straighten the living room or fold laundry or help the kids clean their rooms. Yet, for some strange reason the hubbies have no problem with this. They are happy to lay on the couch and relax, content that they have done sufficient work for the week, taking time to re-cupe and rest for the coming week. I nag and try to get him up to help me with the chores, and he nags me to sit down and relax! I wish I could! But it just feels wrong! Maybe it's just some weird female thing, I cannot sit still for more than a few minutes when I know there is shit to be done. And there is NEVER a time that there is nothing to do. I also have this firm belief that there will be plenty of time to rest and relax when I'm dead! Aaargh... can you see my neuroses???

Well, much to my elation and subsequent shame, I spent the entire day yesterday doing NOT A FREAKIN' THING!!! Yes, you heard right. From 9am until dinnertime, I did nothing. There were books scattered all over the front room, I closed my eyes and walked away. There were toys all over the living room, I stepped over them as if they weren't there. The dishes were piled up in the sink and all over the counter, I put a dishtowel over the top *POOF* they were gone! I sat on the couch with Big Daddy and watched stupid movies, I read a little bit, and after lunch, I took my little Piggy upstairs, crawled into my nice warm bed and napped for 2 1/2 hours! After that, I became active long enough to make dinner and do dishes, then I ran a hot bath, shut the door and read until the bath got cold! I let my kids stay up WAY too late, until they both were damn near passing out from sheer exhaustion, got them settled, climbed into my own bed and proceeded to saw logs in short order!

So, I hope my friend reads this and is proud of me! It took ALOT of effort to just ignore the filth, but I did. I don't expect I'll be doing that again anytime soon. I never really felt relaxed, I just felt lazy. Ain't that a bitch? Maybe I need to find some testosterone so I can embrace or at least enhance my inner sloth!

Birthday wishes

I'll be celebrating my birthday later this month, and all I'm saying is I'm still 30-something! Anyway, I was pondering what I might enjoy doing for my birthday, or what silly little thing might amuse me. At first I thought of new jogging pants and some new sneakers, just because that's what I wear 90% of the time and the ones I have are getting old and sad, then I thought I might like some new bamboo utensils to use on my non-stick pans, I have some but one broke, or maybe a couple of good books, I haven't had anything new to read in awhile. Pretty simple stuff, I'm an easy-going girl, you don't have to buy me diamonds to make my day. Honestly dinner out and a cool punk rock t-shirt sounds awesome! But then, about 2 hours ago, my hopes and dreams for my birthday changed entirely. I heard a horrible noise upstairs, so I ran up and what did I find? The Monkey Man barfing his brains out! Of course my first worry was for him, poor little guy, it breaks my heart! Then I slowly began to notice the aftermath and all I can say is HOLY SHIT! He obviously started off in his bedroom, then left a contribution in the hall and proceeded to hurl again before he could lift the lid of the toilet! Egads! So two hours later, after being on my hands and knees scrubbing copious amounts of vomit out of the carpet and off the walls, I have decided what I REALLY want, more than anything in the world, is new carpet! And if I can't get that, I'd settle for a serious visit from Stanley Steemer or Kiwi!!! It may not be romantic, but after the puke, the dog piss, the wine and more puke, this carpet can't take much more! It's getting so bad that even the dog is offended by it! Sigh.

Too much to do!

This of course is nothing new, I ALWAYS have too much to do, but trying to get shit together again after that damn virus has been hard! I was supposed to participate in the neighborhood-wide garage sale, but that was the first weekend I was sick and was in NO shape to be outside haggling with people over 25-cent shirts! So now I have a garage and bedroom full of all the shit I culled from the wardrobe and the kids' closets with nowhere to go. Part of me thinks I should just pack it all up and take it to Goodwill, grab that donation receipt and run like hell, then part of me knows I could make some decent money, THEN dump what doesn't sell at Goodwill and get the same donation receipt! It's just taking the time to price, advertise and get up early on a Sat. morning! It's all about committing to it and I suck at that!

I have basil that I need to plant next to my tomatoes in back, I have flowers that I need to plant in the bed out front. I need to schedule an appointment with the dentist. I need to finish putting away my Costco run from Friday and I need to finish laundry and wash the dog and vacuum... it seems never-ending (did I mention dusting and cleaning the hardwoods) UGH!! And just so you know, I'm aware that sitting on my ass, swilling tea and blogging is NOT the way to get all this crap done. But hell, the kids are upstairs playing (not screaming for once) and I have a teeny bit of piece to revel in. I'm sure it will change in about 2 minutes, but for now, I blog, I drink tea and I am happy! Everything can wait a few. It will all get done... someday, right?